The Shack

I read the book The Shack by William Young. I have heard great things about it, and not so great things. So I decided to give it a go. In theory, the book is fantastic. Young’s idea for the novel is great, and he is extremely creative. I did, however, have to keep in mind that the book is theological fiction. In practice, it is not necessarily accurate in some aspects (this is my opinion). I don’t feel like it is a good book for those who are new in their faith. It can be confusing and misleading.

I will not go into too much detail about the novel, because I don’t want to ruin anything.

These are some of the topics that Young covers through the character’s rediscovery of his faith:

**NOTE: The things mentioned are not necessarily what I believe. These are just points that the author made. I am writing these in order for you to understand why this book is controversial and confusing to many Christians- new and old. **

-Jesus was not a Christian: Young mentions that Jesus was not a Christian (but a Jew) and that religion is an institution made up by people to distinguish themselves from other groups of people. Jesus was also God. Being a Christian means being in Christ, not just like Christ. Christians base their teaching on Jesus Christ. Being a perfect Jew and being a Christian are much different. Christians are those who realize they are not perfect and have broken the Law of God. They must have grace in order to be accepted by God and must have faith in a mediator to bring them to God and Heaven. Therefore, Jesus could not be a ‘Christian’ in any biblical sense.

-Forgiveness is something you must do in order to show love: Young mentions that, even when someone has not repented, they should be forgiven. He does not specify if this is between a Christian and God, or between humans. In the Bible, it states that one must repent in order to be forgiven. The main character in the book, however, is told that he must forgive his daughter’s murderer, even though he has not repented, and even though he is not remorseful. Until he does, he is claimed as not having faith and not doing what is right.

These are two of the main points that seem to be controversial with readers. Like I said, I am not going to rant and rave about whether I think Young is wrong or right. I think Young brings up some very important issues that every Christ-follower should at least think about. I had to remember that I was reading a fiction theological novel.

All in all, I think you should read it. If anything, it opens your mind up to think about the Lord.

How He Loves

There is something about the David Crowder song “How He Loves” that speaks to me. It is full of passion, truth, and beauty. It is by far one of the best worship songs (in my opinion, of course). I can’t help but to get tears in my eyes every single time I hear it. I feel like it was written about me. I guess, spiritually, it was.

He is jealous for me, Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realize just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.

And oh, how He loves us oh
Oh how He loves us,
How He loves us all

He is jealous for me, Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realize just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.

And oh, how He loves us oh,
Oh how He loves us,
How He loves us all

He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves.

And we are His portion and He is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes,
If his grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking.
And heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss,
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest,
I don’t have time to maintain these regrets,
When I think about, the way…

That He loves us.

One of my favorite lines is “And my heart turns violently inside of my chest.” That is what it will be like when I meet Jesus. Gosh. Can you even imagine what that will be like?

And I do feel like I am bending beneath the weight of his mercy. I can’t help but think about God’s mercy everyday. The mercy given to someone as much of a sinner as I am. I deserve none of it. I bend beneath the weight of it.

And God is jealous for me. He wants all of my heart, mind, and soul to Himself. No distractions. Doesn’t He deserve at least that?

Yes. He does.

This song fills my heart with every single emotion I can think of: Happiness, Sadness, Hope, Desperation, Love, Sorrow, Amazement, Guilt.

It’s all there. In a three minute song.

It’s awesome the things God does to my heart through something as simple as a song.

Simply.

Awesome.

Holiday Pictures

I forgot to share some holiday pictures. Silly me.

stockings!

Andy and his loot.

Christmas Eve tradition: sausage rolls and orange juice

Merry Christmas!

day after Christmas- my birthday! Ms. Cathy brought us cupcakes!

the best mother-in-law ever!

birthday celebration with my favorites!

how we feel after the holidays...

Priorities

It’s so weird how my priorities have changed over the years. Not only have my priorities revolutionized, but the way I contemplate on things has too. I understand that the older I get, the more mature I get. But I just never thought I would be so passionate about certain things.

For instance, being a wife. When I was a freshman in college I never would have thought that being married was something I desired. I guess I just never thought I would find someone for me. My idea of marriage was always misconstrued because of my parents being divorced and remarried. They are fine people, don’t get me wrong. But the older I got the more I never wanted to have to go through that. It was just safer for me to not get married. I feel like my past relationships have been the way they are because of my thoughts on marriage and the thought of “forever.” It scared me. Once I met Andy, though, all of that changed. I had no doubts. I HAD to be with him forever. I would not feel right if I wasn’t. I didn’t need the wedding. I only wanted to be married to him, wedding or no wedding.

I realized during the holidays how important my family is to me. I started thinking about what it would be like when Andy and I have children (something, until recently, I have pushed into the very back crevices of my mind). It made me smile and I realized that we have so much to look forward to.

My lifestyle has altered dramatically in the past few years. I am settled down and content with cuddling on the couch and watching a movie with my husband. I look forward to playing card games with him and cooking him dinner. I relish in the delight he gets when I make him dinner, fold his laundry, and hang his clothes. I feel needed and wanted. That’s where my happiness is. With him. And with Him.

I know my recent writings have nothing but pure cheese and are filled with gross, lovey-dovey crap . That’s because on January 10, 2009 Andy and I will celebrate our very first anniversary. And to me, it’s the most special thing that I will ever celebrate.

On a new subject… it’s a new year and a new decade. That’s pretty cool, yeah? I am awaiting and praying some exciting possibilities for the new year. What’s my resolution? I don’t really have one. But if I had to choose one, it would be…..to become as awesome and witty and Tina Fey. She is WAY cool.

I’m out.

No Subject

I can’t sleep. Andy is gone for a couple of nights on a canoeing trip with the guys. It was a guy’s trip, although I would not want to go canoeing and camping in this cold weather, anyways. Andy is much tougher than I am though and I know he is having a good time. My mom was going to come stay with me, but she did not come back into town today. Hopefully, I will get to see her tomorrow.

I cannot believe how fast this year has flown by. I started off this year with a bang by getting hitched to my best friend. That was the best decision I ever made. I still don’t see what he sees in me. Sometimes I fear that he will wake up one day and not love me anymore. Then again, I don’t see him not loving anyone. He’s full of love. But I know that I don’t deserve him and it makes me wonder if he will realize that one day. I sure hope not.

Anyways, we are coming up on a year and it was the best and fastest year of my life. I feel like it was just yesterday that I met Andy. I was a Freshman, he a sophomore. I think we knew we liked each other when we first met (how could you not, we are both pretty awesome). It just took us a few years to realize it was love. And not just love love. A sincere love. Unconditional.

They say the first year is the hardest. I don’t know who “they” are, but if it’s true, Andy and I have it made. It still feels like we just got married yesterday. It is so easy being married to him. He’s clean, he loves God, he doesn’t smell, and he’s funny…all extremely important things. But best of all, he has a good heart. That’s what I like most about him. Oh, and he’s cute.

I guess I’ll stop with the mushy stuff. I have not written in a while. I guess I could have told you about our Christmas (it was great, by the way…thanks for asking) or what my New Years resolutions are (I don’t have any yet). But I didn’t feel like it. And since it is MY blog, I can write about whatever I want.

I feel like my blog has become lame. I’ll step up the next post with something amazing. Watch for it.

I’m out.

Help-Portrait

This past Sunday afternoon and evening, Andy and I had the privilege of helping out with a charity called Help-Portrait. It is a new organization/idea that has spread nationwide. Click here for more information about it. It’s awesome.

The help-portrait folks assembled at The Foundry Women’s Center in Bessemer. If you have never heard of the Foundry (I had never actually been there until Sunday) it is a center for addicts of all ages. Anyone of any age can come get help with their addictions. They stay in a dorm type building with a lounge area. They go to classes every day, where pastors from different churches and guest speakers come and speak to the students. There are three phases which take the students throughout the entire year. During that year, along with classes, they go to work at different sites The Foundry provides. They also go to church services and have visitation hours for those who have family in town. After a certain amount of time in, the residents can earn free time out of the building. They can get hours, days, and sometime weekends to go home and visit family, go shopping, or just do something fun. After a year, they graduate and are prepared to start their lives over again and head out into the real world. The Foundry also has men’s center down the street.

Many of these people have never had a family portrait made, or have not had one made in a long time. Many can’t afford to have professionals take their pictures. Help-Portrait comes to a site, takes these pictures, and delivers one framed portrait and the rest are put onto a CD for them to keep. Members brought their children, husbands, wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, parents, and grandparents to have these pictures taken with them. They were all filled with so much joy. And so much hope for a better future.

This is a really cool charity and the people we met were so sweet. My job was to help pose people and just interact with them while they were there. Andy took the cards from the camera and loaded the pictures to the computer.

I feel so blessed to have had the opportunity to work with the people we worked with. I definitely want to do more work there at The Foundry. I feel like it is a special place that is really changing the lives of the people that are involved. God is present in their lives everyday now. I spoke with a guy who said he did not know Jesus until he showed up at The Foundry. He said now Jesus is in his heart, mind, and soul. He said that, with everything he does and says, he wants it to be a testament to God and the change He can bring if you have faith. He has been away from his wife (who was with him for his portrait) for 4 months, and said it has been the hardest but the best 4 months of his life because of the change God has made in their marriage.

I was excited to get to spend an afternoon there. Time is more precious than money these days. Andy and I have to plan things months ahead of time in order to be able to make commitments to people, and so that we don’t make false commitments to people. We were excited and blessed to get to block of this afternoon of our free time to do something with Help-Portrait and The Foundry.

I’m out.

“This will be the best Christmas ever-it’s the first one I can remember being clean and sober. I want this so bad. I know what women out there are feeling. They are stuck, waiting for a place to get help. Well, now I know, you don’t have to be stuck.”
- Foundry resident

Whoa

If this doesn’t make you appreciate our soldiers fighting for our country, I don’t know what will.

from CNN's website

That’s all.

Crazy Dream or Real Life?

I am scared of guns and most people know that. I hate them. Last night I had one of those dreams where, when you wake up, you still think it is real. I have had this dream before though. Only once, when I was in the 4th grade.

When I was in 4th grade my mom, brother, and I went to visit my Granny. We went to visit her a good bit (but not enough) because she only lives about an hour away. It was during our summer break so Mom took a few days off of work and we went out there for a couple of days.

One day we decided to go “into town” to get groceries. I was not in the mood to go out and wanted to stay behind. Well, because I was only in 4th grade, my mom was absolutely not going to let me stay back by myself. My brother, in 7th grade, wanted to go so he wouldn’t have stayed behind with me. Of course I threw a fit because I didn’t want to go (I was a brat at times). My brother had almost given in, when my sweet Granny told me that she really wanted me to go with her because she didn’t get to see me much. So I, of course, went into town with them. And I actually had fun. Granny even bought me a stuffed animal cat and some candy. I was happy as lark as we were pulling into her driveway.

As we walked up to the door, I was first. I reached for the doorknob and realized the door was already opened, and it looked busted. I knew right then, what had happened. I was in shock and just stood there. My mom saw the look on my face, looked at the door, and told us all to stay outside. My brother went in with my mom, anyways.

Everything in the house was thrown everywhere. Nothing was in its place. It looked like it was straight out of one of those movies that I wasn’t supposed to watch. The TV, VCR, jewelry, and anything worth something was gone. Paw Paw had some old rifles mounted up on a gun rack on the wall. Ever since my Paw Paw died, Granny kept a small pistol in her drawer for safety. I never knew she had it. The guns on the wall, which I was always afraid of (of course they weren’t loaded, but I was young and didn’t understand that) were gone. That empty wall, which used to house those rifles, was empty. For whatever reason that scared me to death. Someone was running around with those rifles. I knew people had guns, but I never saw anyone with one. But now I KNEW that someone had a gun.

The house was a wreck when the police arrived. They dusted for fingerprints, so black dust was in various places. Mom didn’t want Matt and me to get scared, (although it was already a little late) so she sent us to our Aunt and Uncle’s house down the road to spend the night. They laid out palets for us and our cousins. We had a movie marathon and ate popcorn. As if that was going to take my mind off of the fact that my brother and I could have been in that house by ourselves when those men came and stole the guns. There is no telling what would have happened.

I had the stuffed animal that Granny bought me earlier that day with me all night. I kept thinking about her and how scared and upset she must be. I couldn’t help but think that, had she not asked me to come with her that day, Matt and I would have been there. Helpless. I finally fell asleep watching the Mighty Ducks that night. I had a dream about what happened earlier that day, except I was in the house and a toy gun was chasing me.

I had that same dream again last night. It was so real.

Those men were eventually found. They had Granny’s rifles in the back of their pickup truck. The guns were the only thing that the cops found. I was relieved to know that they were safe again. They were in the hands of someone I knew. And that is when I finally relaxed and quit living with the fear that someone else had the guns.

It’s funny how our minds work. I think I had the dream because Andy is talking about getting a gun for safety purposes. Just in case we do have an intruder. I told him it would take me a while before I actually held one and learned how to use it. They just make me so…. nervous.

Anyways, sorry for the weird post. I just thought it was weird how our brains work, you know?

I’m out.

The Feast of 1621 (The First Thanksgiving)

By popular demand, here is another holiday post to celebrate one of my favorite holidays. I won’t go into loads of detail about Thanksgiving, because you should know the history of Thanksgiving. But I do want to share the important facts, myths, and what was on the menu on that glorious day. In 1621, the Plymouth colonists and Wampanoag Indians shared a harvest feast which today, is known as the first Thanksgiving celebration in the colonies. The meal and gathering symbolized cooperation between the colonist and the Native Americans that first inhabited the land.

Even though this is known as the first act of “thanksgiving,” historians have recorded other thanksgiving ceremonies among European settlers in North America. In December 1619 near the Charles River a group of British settlers, led by Captain John Woodlief, knelt in prayer and pledged “thanksgiving” to God for their safe and healthy arrival after a voyage across the Atlantic. This event has been marked by some scholars as the official first Thanksgiving among European settlers on record.

Either way, the purpose of Thanksgiving remained the same: to share thanks with family, friends, and loved ones.

So, what did the pilgrims and natives eat at their thanksgiving? First and foremost, they did not even forks. They used their hands, spoons, and knives and wiped their hands on cloth napkins. The best food was placed next to the “most important” people at the table. There was no sampling, and everyone ate what was closest to them. Bummer.

Venison and wild fowl were always on the table at the feast. Vegetables did not play a strong role in the feast as they do today. Because of the time of year, some vegetables were unavailable to them at the time of the feast. They did not have pies or cakes. One, they did not have much sugar leftover from their voyage. Two, they did not have ovens or any way to cook the cakes and pies. The pilgrims also used tons of spices: cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg, and dried fruit. There was only salt on the table and no pepper. Pepper was used as a spice while cooking.

While we take home leftovers and put them in our Frigidaire, the pilgrims and natives dried their foods (corn, hams, fish, and herbs) to preserve them.

With our Thanksgiving mindset comes certain myths. Even though this feast was celebrated in 1621, it did not become a tradition because it was not actually repeated. The pilgrims did not wear black and white clothing and wear buckles. Buckles were not in style until later in the century and black and white were only worn on Sundays. Women actually wore red, earthy green, brown, blue, violet, and gray, while men wore clothing in white, beige, black, earthy green, and brown. Some even think that the pilgrims ended up where they did only because of a navigational mistake. Actually, the pilgrims were planning to settle in Virginia, but not the modern-day state of Virginia. They were part of the Virginia Company, so they had the rights to most of the eastern seaboard of the colonies. Treacherous seas, however, prevented them from venturing further south.

Okay. There you have it. Take it or leave it.

So once in every year we throng
Upon a day apart,
To praise the Lord with feast and song
In thankfulness of heart.
-Arthur Guiterman, The First Thanksgiving

It’s Raining Gold….

It’s not raining gold money of course, but gold leaves. When I was driving to work today, I noticed that it was really raining leaves. I saw gold, orange, and red leaves falling from the sky. It was one of the most beautiful things I have seen in a long time. The sky was clear blue and the sun was bright. And the beautiful leaves were everywhere. It reminded me of why Fall is my favorite season (not that I needed reminding). If I were cool and had an iPhone (or if my phone would take pictures) I would have taken a picture of it to show you. But I don’t. So I didn’t.

Anyways, I realized today that Christmas is just around the corner, mainly because my co-workers are playing Christmas music from their computers. I feel like it was just Christmas. On Christmas last year, I was three weeks away from getting married. The Christmas season was all a blur, and I felt like all everyone talked about was the wedding (and it was all I could think about honestly). I was behind on shopping and I did not have a real tree. The only reason I had a tree was because my neighbor gave me a free one with Miller Light ornaments (which I did not use). I was already moved into our new place and was by myself. We had a Christmas shower and got some great ornaments to fill up a tree, but by the time I got the tree, the only thing I had time to do was put white lights on it and put down a tree skirt. My spirit was non-existent because I did not have a real tree like I wanted. I wasn’t thankful for the free tree I received from my nice neighbor. I was so ungrateful that it wasn’t what I wanted. I was accustomed to my parents’ tree which is always perfect. It was my first Christmas in 22 years where I did not have a nice tree. And it was my first Christmas where I did not completely enjoy myself. I was a Scrooge on the inside, and pretended on the outside.

The tree was the essence of Christmas for me. But how stupid could I be? I had completely lost sight of what Christmas is about. And honestly, until the late Christmas Eve service we went to at church, I had no desire for the holiday. Then, during the beautiful service it all came to me. I was being so completely selfish and wallowing in my own self-pity. There are tons of people that enjoy Christmas and celebrate Christmas with a happy heart that don’t have trees and decorations. They don’t have monies to buy gifts with. They don’t have a smorgasbord of food to eat. Some don’t have family to celebrate with. But they still celebrate in their own little way.

My room at my parents’ house was all in a cluster since I had moved, so I spent the rest of the Christmas Eve in our new place by myself. I woke up on Christmas morning and felt renewed. I had nothing distracting me. It was just me on Christmas morning. I woke up a little early and sat on the couch with my cat and a blanket, watched a little bit of A Christmas Story, and drank some hot chocolate for breakfast (a new tradition I started). I remember looking at my pitiful tree and just smiling. Hey, it wasn’t great. But it was a tree.

I am so dense sometimes. After last year, I realized how ridiculous I was being. This year is going to be different. My mind is with it this year and, most importantly, so is my heart. I am so thankful for every single blessing. We are getting ready to move to a new place right before Thanksgiving. As much as I would like a tree to decorate this year, it may not happen. But you know what, I am totally okay with that. I have what I need this year. I had it last year, but I appreciate it more this year.

I’m out.

“External heat and cold had little influence on Scrooge. No warmth could warm, no wintry weather chill him. No wind that blew was bitterer than he, no falling snow was more intent upon its purpose, no pelting rain less open to entreaty.”
-A Christmas Carol , Charles Dickens